Life – Page 2 – Live To List

September 4, 2017May 23, 2018

August Summary

Culture

In the month of August, I didn’t make it to any’cultural’ events (yesterday’s post was in Septemebr). I did put two book talks into my calendar, and then got analysis paralysis. You can purchase an annual membership and then book talks are included. I always want to ensure I get the value for money. Perhaps I need to ‘treat’ myself the $40 for a year – it also garner’s a discount on book purchases, but I know that’s a habit I don’t have.

I met with Mum, on her birthday, to complete two urns of flowers for the church for our ‘feast day’, St Laurence, who was burnt on a grill if I recall correctly!

Romance

After laying low one day (ie a sick day) I was starved for company and said yes to a drink nearby. It turned into dinner and he was generous to pay for the whole event. That being said, we were not a match. For me, there’s one thing I’m not ‘liberal minded’ about and it’s drug use. I’m all for them being legalised, and reducing harm. But they aren’t for me, and they aren’t for someone I would share a life with. So it was a lovely night out, easy conversation and no awkward follow up.

Some friends sometimes keep me ‘at home’ and we cook!

Work

Recently spending a day with a friend with a baby, who I don’t see regularly, she said ‘you’ve not been happy in your job for a while now’, and even mentioned a year! It was shocking to have this reflected to me. I do admit that it’s been more challenging since Easter when there were big changes in management. I was definitely refreshed by my three week holiday in May. I took the step of telling my boss this today – he didn’t offer much reassurance. I actually drafted a long post about work, but figured there was nothing to be shared but it did help me process and sort my thoughts a little.

Health

I seem to persistently have a niggling cough or sore throat. I took 3.5 sick days, around what would have usually been a weekend I’d have worked, due to a huge wind storm. One upside of the bed ridden time was seeing my weight down to my target weight (72kg), and it hasn’t stayed that low, but it was a small reward.

I have noticed that I often only need two meals in a day. That helps reducing my eating out expenditure at least :p

In between the on again off again cold, I went to F45. My three months is rapidly approaching, and so is water polo season. I’m trying to decide if I do one or both. I am intending to change water polo clubs to be closer to one closer to where I live.

Bought

New work out top selfie (after working out!)

I had set myself a weight loss reward, and I met it, so I went and purchased more work out gear. I went planning to buy ‘a top’ and ended up with two tops and a sports bra. Two were on sale. I can’t even recall when I last bought a sports bra, so I’m hardly being reckless.

I also bought

two part epoxy to mend a glass bowl I store pegs in
Lush items – solid deodorant & shampoo & tooth powder
flights, a night’s accomodation and car hire to Byron Bay for a wedding at the end of September
hair cut and colour <- MY FIRST HAIR DYE EVER

I’m noticing other than the above, eating out and targeted savings, there’s nothing too interesting in my expenses: some fuel, public transit card top up, phone credit & insurance for my scooter. I feel reassured that I’m not cluttering up my home with things,

Ate out

My friends drag me to the prettiest places (yes, sick weekend)

Oh so many times! It seems predominantly on the weekends, and almost all meals! Thankful for a ‘sick’ weekend, but I still went out to savour some social contact! I tallied up as best I could, and it comes to about $500, and 5 a piece on b’fasts, lunches and dinners, and then some ‘drinks’ either coffees, alcohol, or dessert/cake. I’m not sure the numbers are enough to see me start havign people over for meals – I just get such anxiety about their comfort, but also waste.

Read

The hyperlinks are to Goodreads – I don’t believe in buying books remember

Nothing to Envy: Ordinary Lives in North Korea – Barbara Derrick – incredibly well written, and given I’ve felt down on my life, it’s helped me realise how extremely comfortable and happy I am.

The Most Good You Can Do: How effective altruism is changing ideas about living ethically – Peter Singer. I didn’t finish this and couldn’t renew it as it was requested by someone else. I did enjoy it, and it certainly further added to my analysis paralysis on career, earnings, spending and the ‘most good’.

From Sand and Ash – Amy Harmon. This was read in ONE SITTING. This isn’t at all common for me – I was off sick, but I just loved this book. Reading about war was interesting, especially after reading about war last month too, by Scott Turow

What was the highlight of your August?

August 2, 2017May 23, 2018

July Summary

Vera Blue – yep, second concert of hers this year I’ve been to

Culture

Zero waste events – screening of the clean bin project with a great three person panel afterwards. Also a waste reduction talk which was a little more homegrown. I’m so thankful for a friend I play water polo with for suggesting these, and proud all my nattering about my ways over the years have taken seed in her mind.

Caught up with a friend who lives out of town, but we went to school together. She announced she’s got a great job ‘back’ in Melbourne, where she was until her role brought her to Newcastle. IT feels right for her, but me too, for her to be in Melbourne.

A close friend had a birthday and quite last minute I joined our friends to axe throw! Yep, inner Sydney has a place to axe throw. We were all equally rubbish and awesome in different rounds so there were lots of laughs and fun had. Here’s our instructor – looks the part right?

Right on the border of the end of the month, I went to a concert with a close friend, whose middle name is also Vera! It was my second Vera Blue show this year, and I did prefer the other venue as it was more spacious, and I didn’t experience a group of unruly men last time. This same friend and her partner joined me for a great fancy dinner, post up next.

Romance

Brunch with a gal pal – rose water porridge. SO much awesome.

Started talking to one or two guys in a more authentic and genuine chats than recent experiences – I continue to refine my profile to include my thoughts/expectations and I think it’s weeded out some of the sorts of people who used to reach out but I found no match with. I also added or started using a different app (Bumble) as another single male friend kept mentioning it. It’s a lot less information about people, and women must initiate conversation. It’s not struck any gold yet.

There was someone I was very keen on lately, but realised that we weren’t a good match and it would only lead to me being very hurt later on. I made the tough decision to stop contacting him, with a brief warning to him. It’s been easy some days and incredibly hard other days.

Work

Agh, can we not? Work’s been challenging. The change is really impacting one of the team, and I take his outbursts and dissatisfaction to heart. Many of the things that are driving him to be so angry are beyond my control and sometimes, squarely sit with decisions of my manager. Taking it one day at a time. Some days are better than others.

Health

The first week I was injured with a glute strain, so I did 2 works outs at F45, Sat (injury day) and Monday and a Barre on Tuesday. After seeing a physio and giving myself a little rest, it cam good, and I got back to F45 3-4 times a week. Barre kept being booked out when I wanted to go (or just far more challenging than before), so I decided to drop the $35 a week cost for two classes, and focus on F45 for the remainder of my 3 month trial. This month I took on Dry July somewhat unexpectedly. I have a friend who has a way of phrasing things like we’d already talked about it, and it’s decided. She’s done the same with a Christmas trip to Japan, but that’s a bigger thing to be roped into! Anyhow, I started being dry earlier than July to allow for our ‘reward’ dinner which I’ll blog about. Part of our goals were to both lose 4kgs. Neither of us truly met out targets. However, I did, in a way… The night after our Dry July pact, I weighed myself and was 80kg. This was uncharacteristically high and I attribute to some food poisoning. Sometime in July I did weigh 75.7kg. So, target met! However, I haven’t stayed that low, since going back to 77kg, and then back to under 76kg. Late in July, I paid to have a full body analysis as part of F45, which goes beyond weight. They explained that water retention changes throughout a month for women, so perhaps it’s that? In any case, the body scan is repeated in eight weeks, so I’ll see how I go with that.

Bought

I like to track all the stuff that trickles into my home – cause having a streamlined or minimal home takes a watchful eye. I did eat out and spend on food, and sometimes think I should track my eating out and keep it a little lower for financial savings, but also help my health. Maybe a new category (and a way to share food photos I take :p) The first two dot points hardly count, as they are gifts and not staying!

An engagement gift, right in line with my zero waste ways and help them set up their home 🙂
Two gifts for hostesses – one was a plant, the other was a bunch of flowers
Lush tooth powder
Phone case – after dropping it cleaning and cracking the glass screen protector, I decided on a robust case and haven’t looked back

Read

I borrowed a book by an author I quite like, Scott Turow, but between it being large print, hard cover and a slow start, I just couldn’t get into it, and returned it rather than renewed it when it came time. Not to be discouraged, I borrowed another Turow book to try again, as I have really enjoyed the other two I have read.

Money: A love story – Kate Northrup – I can’t recall how this was on my reading list. I found it a little too meandering for my liking, so started leafing through to the activities, which were lots of journal writing. When I did the money quiz, it was clear I had little need for reform! Actually, I thought I wasn’t tracking well in the quiz (ie not knowing my bank balance within $100s, not knowing how much I spent last month within $100) but overall, I scored sufficiently to be in the most proficient category.
A beginners guide to acting English – Shappi Khorsandi – I LOVED this book. I didn’t realise until I had finished the book that she’s a comedian. It’s about her childhood and moving from Iran to England, during a very interesting time in Iran’s history. I would now read anything she writes!
The most good you can do – Peter Singer – an interesting book to be reading after my post on paying off my mortgage, and in the month I received an inheritance.

How was your month?

July 1, 2017May 23, 2018

June summary

The other day, my mobile phone recharged (yes, I’m on prepay) and I realised a month had flown by since i got back from Europe. I spent a week or two after returning recovering from mild but lingering cold. Work gobbled me up, however, these summary posts remind me, that’s not ALL that happened!

Culture

I started thinking I’d done nothing, but then I found photos of a band I went to with my brother. Simon doesn’t know them, but enjoyed them, and said more than once that he couldn’t believe I like this genre of music. Shrugs. They sung a cover of a song I love too – a cover that they adjust the words to, and make EVEN better!

Thundamental concert – Blue Mountain’s born and bred

I also had my turn of doing flowers for the church. There was a funeral, right after I did it, and I had requests for the colours and flowers. I hope they were happy! In any case, I was proud of the outcome.

Romance

We should rename this section “photos I took of food when I ate out”, because none of the following were at ‘dates’! I’ve really slowed down from dating. Some of this is due to focusing more on my fitness. But also, you get fatigued with profile reading and become very judgemental. So instead, here’s snippets of a breakfast with friends, a great cafe near my parents, so I spent the night at their house. Actually, three Friday nights I stayed with my parents, once for the flowers, once for this brunch and once to take them to the airport on Saturday morning.

I have a lovely friend who I met at church who also lives locally, and when he’s in town we catch up for coffee or breakfast prior.

Work

I have settled back into a groove – the week or two post holidays I was clearly revitalised and much more perky and upbeat than some around me. It’s worn off a little, but I’ve worked long hours again this week – really trying to take some load off my team, but also preparing to hit the ground running in the new financial year with all the ambitious targets and programs. So much so, I left work late on Friday 30th June, and was mighty angry at my boss <- it was NOT his fault, but being angry at myself was not fun :p

Health

I did it – I joined F45. I did a week’s trial and attended three classes, and still did my usual 2 Barre tone classes. It’s around $580 for a 3 month membership, and I feel this is a timeline I can commit to. I paid upfront, as I HATE automatic deductions and all the rules to cease the deductions. And, to be totally hypocritical, I do happily pay $35 per week for two classes at Barre Body, and sometimes miss weeks due to illness. Seems sometimes, the ‘cost per class’ I can stomach!?

I also did a special Barre class on the 30th, and was late, which was by candlelight. I thought it would be darker, with the light dimmer more, but alas no. Still, it was a different teacher and routine/style to usual so that was a mix up from usually doing F45 on Fridays and Barre on Saturday.

Bought

Shopping haul – pillow protectors, suction hooks, a moisture absorbing egg and candle making items

Candle wicks – to remake candles from leftover wax
Suction hooks to hang coats – sadly didn’t work on our loggia tiles, but the internal bifold glass is a winner!
Moisture absorbing ‘egg’ – ceramic with material inside that can be microwaved and reused! An impulse purchase

Marcs cropped Lani wool jacket – $100 off spot sale, so $179.95
White bra from Target
Wooden shelf and hardware to ‘expand’ storage in my pantry
Cancer council sunglasses – replacing the pair left overseas
Cancer council lip balm – an impulse purchase
Two pairs of runners – one pair for high impact, blue and pretty, one pair for lower impact, black and great for long walks

New (second hand) bed frame. The Ikea Malm fell apart when I moved, and I made do, but it creaked and felt on it’s last legs. I wanted a padded head so I could sit up and read, or blog. $175!
The Ikea bed

The new bed head, and the existing (hacked) ledge

Between paying for the F45 membership, and these little shopping moments, I feel quite cash poor. Hopefully in coming weeks and months, it’ll feel better having prepaid the workouts at least.

Read

The bricks that built this house – Kate Tempest. Very disappointing, I have NO idea why I read it to completion
Innocent – Scott Turow – a great author, I really feel like you get to know the characters but without making it long, and a compelling story that isn’t predictable.

Looking ahead to July, I hope to continue on the 5 weekly work outs, trying Dry July with a friend, and rewarding ourselves for those two feats with a fancy dinner at The Bridge Room.

June 3, 2017January 9, 2021

May Summary

Culture:

There was bucket loads of culture this month, given I spent two weeks in four other countries! I won’t reiterate what’s in countless posts (you can click on the travel category on the right to get them all in one place, or select a country).

Films on the plane

Passengers
Fences
Collateral Beauty

Wanted to watch

Loving
Manchester by the Sea
I, Daniel Blake
Jackie
Lion
Split

Romance:

With the travel, the meeting of new people slowed *right* down, but that isn’t to say I didn’t keep in contact with a few new people and a few people from previous months.

Work:

My role was backfilled by someone of my choosing, and he did a GREAT job. We were in email contact from time to time, as I like a daily check and file of emails whilst travelling. I find that this keeps ‘on top of things’ rather than having a whole day back at work just sorting emails out.

I continue to ponder the future of my company, and my place within it. I feel like I’m no longer growing and learning, as much as I’m otherwise enjoying things. I’m not sure how or what would challenge me. Food for thought!

Health:

My fitness has dropped right off, with travelling. It might be nice to assume I did a lot of walking, but I think more days than not were largely sedentary. I did hike a glacier, and ride 7km in Heidelberg between the wedding and the reception. I had initiated contact prior to coming home from holidays with a F45 studio, and hoped to go my first weekend back, but have been knocked over with a cold.

Bought:

Gifts

mints for Mum in a tin with Modrian’s famous block painting from the Netherlands
a skein of Icelandic teal wool for a cousin
my favourite children’s book as a gift for a pregnant friend

Clothing etc

two black long sleeved tops from Lululemon for my trip (one is about to be eBayed as it served it’s purpose whilst away, and I know I won’t chose to wear it day to day)
eight pairs of knickers for the imminent trip
two second hand clutches – to store and corral items whilst travelling. One is blush pink pleather, the other is dark purple silk. Both served their purpose exceedingly well!
a secondhand backpack for the travels

Other things

a picnic blanket/bag secondhand
two second hand novels for my trip – one was great, the other I intentionally left on a plane!
deodorant – in a cardboard ‘push’ tube – yay for no plastic
charging cable for my iPhone (it’s great, there’s LED lights to know when the item’s fully charged vs charging! No light means it’s not charging)

Read:

As I alluded to in the bought section, I had two books, one was great, and listed below, the other was a let down, and promptly forgotten!. I also picked up a great book at a book swap, and am pleased to find the author has a number of other titles, which I’ve promptly added to my library ‘to read’ list.

Identical – Scott Turow – a great crime fiction, based loosely around an ancient Greek myth!
A Treacherous Paradise – Henning Mankell – bought second hand as a ‘Nordic’ fiction. In the end, the female Swede spends most of her time in Mozambique, so a misdirect on the planned setting I’d hoped for, but still incredibly interesting commentary on race relations in the early 1900s

May 22, 2017May 23, 2018

A Heidelberg wedding

Gum and kangaroo’s paw for a nod to Australia

The seed that started my 2017 tour of Europe was an invitation to a wedding in Heidelberg. J is a friend I’ve had since 1999, when she was a boarding house supervisor and I was a student. During the intervening years, we’ve both lived in Europe, and in different parts of Australia, but early on we formed a strong friendship via email when she was completing a part of her PhD in Bonn in Germany. When I lived in France in 2006, she was back in Brisbane, Australia, but in 2008 when I returned to France for a three week Women in Engineering conference/summer school, I spent a few days with her in Heidelberg. In late 2010, J visited me in Sydney for a weekend, and quite on a whim, I decided to go to Germany for a white Christmas. It was a fabulously snowy winter, and I got to meet a number of J’s colleagues and friends.

J met her partner T, at work, however returned to work for CSIRO in Melbourne Australia not long after they’d started dating (at least… that’s my recollection!). For a number of years they did a long distance relationship, but J found a job back in Heidelberg and they were reunited. In December last year (2016), T formally proposed, and they set a date of 20 May 2017.

A candid photo…! This was after a long (formal) photography session..

I’ve never attended a German wedding, and J is also quite naturalised as an Australian, so there was some variations on German wedding. For example, at the reception, games and skit/performances are quite common in German weddings, and this wasn’t largely done. That only happened to the smallest extent – there was a tub of sand they had to dig through for treasure…. And a projected address from a whole heap of famous Germans (Angela Merkel, a football star, Darth Vader etc) I assume wishing them all the best.

The bridesmaids had to help decide on which shoes; and where to pin the something old & blue

Bridesmaid selfi – me, Karen and Eva-Stina

The wedding ceremony was held in a lovely old church in a monastery. I was so perplexed being told that the pew decorations were being double sided taped – I’m used to pews having a ‘head’ or something similar, with which one can loop around. Nope – not these modern, minimalistic pews! And sure enough, at least two arrangements in their glass test tubes did become detached… 🙁 The test tubes were a gentle nod to J’s chemistry background, and I don’t know about T’s studies and work, but perhaps his too. So much so, at the reception, the lolly table held things in beakers and test tubes in racks.

It felt like every detail was attended to – in the sense that, it feels like all the lovely things were there, nothing was forgotten or struck off. Here’s some of the lovely details

every pew had a floral decoration (not every second etc)

Page boy awaiting the blessing of the rings

plants and little vases to decorate the low stone wall
floral napkins to put out with cakes, croissants and quiches for after church
a coffee cart, which also poured and distributed champagne (or similar)
bikes to cycle between the ceremony and the reception, complete with helmets!

The bridal couple had left, and the entourage was leaving the monastery

lace bows for attaching to car antennas (which I made with my room mate); but the florist who’d decorated the bridal tandem bike, had left wired bows to decorate the bikes

Marriage is like riding through life on the same bike?

sushi snacks for cocktail hour at the reception

tablescapes that included
- placeholders were little glass jars with a chalk label and bowled lollies inside with T heart J and similar
- coasters with ‘Advice for the bride and groom’
- love hearts out of novel pages & wooden cursive ‘love’

a table set up for children – with colouring books and mini lego
bathrooms with make up wipes and sanitary items (and pew flowers (roses) which I’d rescued and mimed to the florist we could reuse)
a lolly station (despite there being about 6 dessert options in a pick and choose layout)

Yes three steaks – on from Germany, one from Ireland, one aged

A sorbet better the collection of starters and the mains. You could have sparkling wine or gin added – what a PUNCH!

It was such a wonderful night (and day!). The bike ride between the locations was a lovely part of J & T’s story, and it was SUCH a lovely day to do it. Everyone waved and clapped and honked their horns. And I didn’t fall off. I may have been a little immodest riding in a dress, but it’s not that uncommon either. The reception was lovely and leisurely, and we were seated with really interesting people, who spoke English and German, so were wonderful at summarising speeches and helping decipher the menu/blackboard, though some things just aren’t translatable: mashinis was mashed potato in a martini glass, and was to be served as a midnight snack 🙂 That being said, I think we left after 1am, and fresh from having desert, so the midnight snack was shelved.

April 11, 2017May 24, 2018

Humming Puppy Yoga

So a very dear friend and blog reader gave me a great birthday gift – she named it an Advent calendar and the concept is to do different ‘bucket list experiences’ each month together. We started with my birthday dinner at Momofuku, and then things slowed down! Of course, I have things I want to see and do that didn’t feature on her 12 months of birthday fun Advent calendar, and I got busy in March doing all sorts of fun things.

The light ruins what is a lush waiting area

One thing she’d earmarked us doing was Humming Puppy Yoga – funny name right? It’s a yoga studio that has a resonant frequency going at all times, as well as being constantly at 27 C. Warm, but just right. This weekend, I went along to try it.

I selected the class based on timing – 2.30pm would work well around church (as it was a long Palm Sunday service). The class at that time was called Mellow Yoga which sounded like just what I’d feel like on a Sunday afternoon!

This place is next level on chic, hipster, boutique exercise. It’s like first class style. The waiting area and bathrooms were stunning. I’d settle just to ‘wait’ for someone and never do a class and die happy! They are upstairs from a tea store, so there’s two teas to sip, or coconut water or filtered water. Luxury right?

The studio is the third or top level of the building. The room was wonderfully dark for the session with only muted lighting and a lit candle. The session was an hour long, and it was blissfully relaxed and over before you knew it. My friend S said it was an expensive place for a nap, but cheap for therapy – and it really is a hybrid of the two!!

Of course, it wouldn’t be a complete visit without dropping in on the tea lounge. Again, jaw droppingly gorgeous in style. We had Ginger lattes and some fancy snacks (you know, all goey and power foods but nothing like conventional food!)

The counter top is also broken tile – wonder how cleaning goes?

I’m coming back til I’ve had every mocktail!

I’m not sure if I’ll do expensive yoga again, but I want more of those drinks!!

March 6, 2016January 7, 2021

Super Tuesday & the US elections

I’ve never cared much for the US political system, though lately I have been reading The Economist more, and found myself in the US at a critical (probably one of many) time in the race to the presidency. I bought an Economist magazine prior to leaving Australia which meant I was ‘up to date’ once I arrived, and slotted straight into CNN’s Republican debate Thursday week ago. (sorry, I tried to queue this up unsuccessfully)

One of the presidential candidates businesses.... — One of the presidential candidates businesses….

As a mildly engaged person in this electorial race, here’s my thoughts

Trump is definitely charismatic – he speaks to the Everyman and that’s proving to be VERY powerful

Trump gets ‘attacked’ by Rubio and Cruz for being a supporter of left policies – socialist health care, pro choice etc. I can see this being part of his appeal, as he puts himself as the fence sitting candidate, or the more moderate right voters.

I feel all the Republicans are woefully lacking in understanding the threat that North Korea is (maybe I am – but the place seems so poor that it’s ability to threaten the US seem unlikely)

I bemoan the families in politics. The Bush family. The Clinton family.

I do appreciate the overall diversity of three of five of the strongest candidates – a woman, and two candidates with Latino names. And then there’s Dr Carson (an AFRICAN AMERICAN) in the Republicans! I commend that!

So much time and energy is spent on selecting a leader and all the rhetoric, but in reality everything will need to be approved by Congress or similar. Compromise is what government is about – so no matter what pledges they make, it’ll be diluted over time.

I hate fear mongering: the dole bludgers, the illegal migrants ‘stealing’ jobs. The whole argument is as bad the name calling. So rarely is it based on facts, but instead on emotion. And what annoys me about emotion? That only ‘certain’ emotions are acceptable.

It seems that money drives how many candidates stay in the race. This just seems ridiculous to me – the endless fundraising! And honestly, no matter the policies, I have every assumption that there’s ‘no such thing as a free lunch’.

I took the time to do a quiz on which candidate I would back. It didn’t surprise me that I was 94% for Sanders – the Socialist candidate. I was surprised to see myself making qualifications for some of my more generous or open minded ideas. I’m not sure if that’s due to three years with the BF who is a strong business advocate, or my role in ‘management’. I may not like the idea of the nepotism, but I can’t be sad to see a left learning candidate that is a female leading the US. And if I was asked to vote to the right, my thoughts would probably go towards Kasich – from the tiny amount I’ve read about him! He seems compassionate, experienced and reasonable. But in the CNN debate, he hardly had a moment to shine – it’s was a Trump show, and when others were speaking, it was often to attack Trump.

Overall, I don’t feel like the USA is the strongest nation. It can’t be strong when it has such an under paid and under supported working class in fast food restaurants, or cleaning hotels. I worry about a country whose allowed companies far too much power, how can it be ok to list ‘artificial and natural flavours’ and leave it at that? How can companies opt out of Workplace Health and Safety? How can states NOT have income tax? I even rile up that the price of something isn’t what’s marked – tax is added later, and then if it’s service based, then there’s tipping – it feels like businesses opt out of structuring their business in a way that can pay their staff a wage. I do agree it can improve service (but it’s still not always as good as it could be), but it’s like bumping the livelihood of someone onto the whim of peer pressure to tip!?

On the other hand of all my negative thoughts, I am heartened by start ups and new technologies. We used uber and lyft countless times – it was simple, it didn’t feel any less safe, and I feel like it allows disruption the status quo.

Seeing more of my readers are not Americans, what are your thoughts out there, fellow Aussies, Canadians and other readers?

December 9, 2015May 24, 2018

Mental health first aid

The past two days, I’ve been on the NSW Central Coast learning how to do first aid – for mental health conditions including depression, anxiety, pychosis and substance abuse, including touching on suicide. The trainer said we’re a pretty cutting edge to be training in this, so that always feels nice.

I learnt SO much, and it was an ‘opt in’ course, which meant everyone WANTED to be there, and often had much to share. I was delighted to find three staff who came with less than 24 hours notice of the course. I didn’t think to suggest it, as I didn’t think anyone would be interested – there’s no financial reward! And as a manager, I’m not the ideal candidate (but due to my gender, and the generally few women in depots, it also makes sense – it’ll not be staff who report to me who’d likely come and see me, but I also like being educated about things that may still affect my staff).

If nothing else, this cartoon helps understand what sympathy is and how it differs from empathy.

There was lots of myth busting

Talking about suicide – literally asking ‘have you had suicidal thoughts?’ and ‘do you have a plan?’ does not risk the chances of suicide. Usually, the respondent feels a weight lifting that someone noticed and cared enough to ask.
Substance abuse disorder is an actual mental health condition, but often in addition to, or masking/self medicating another mental health condition.
Psychosis – don’t refute or agree with any hallucinations. Like with many other symptoms, empathise how that might feel (scary!) but don’t try to ‘prove’ it’s all in the mind.
Anxiety is more prevalent in women.
Cannabis can ‘switch on’ paranoia and psychosis with one use if someone is genetically predisposed.
Handing crying people tissues isn’t advised – it can be interpreted as showing your discomfort with tears. Just have them easily accessible, but don’t offer them.
Almost all mental health conditions are recoverable, and certainly manageable to return to a suitable quality of life
Many smokers use it as a way to treat a mental health conditions.
People who have panic attacks often avoid exercise as it can mimic the symptoms. And panic disorder can result in agoraphobia, because on the fear that there’ll be no one to help and care for them in a traumatic experience that they think will kill them.
The main difference between heart attacks and panic attacks is… panic attacks have a fear of death. Heart attacks find people focusing on the pain.

I hope I may have taught you something (and I hope I got things right from memory!)

November 20, 2015January 9, 2021

Sculptures by the sea 2015

Every year in late October and early November, the famed walk from Bondi Beach to Bronte Beach is used as a backdrop for a sculpture competition (though it ends at Tamarama Beach). Most years, I delay and delay until I’ve missed going. This year, I went on the morning of the last day. Which means I just missed our latest Prime Minister!

Here’s some of my favourites

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 013 — All the corks

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 015 — Copper – I love the tarnish

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 017 — Shiny fat cat

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 024 — White guys are sculptures

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 011 — Perfect for a Sunday visit

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 006 — Bondi Icebergs pools

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 026 — Fish teathered to the land

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 028 — Art vs Life 1

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 029 — Art vs Life 2

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 030 — Mirror hanging from tree branches

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 031 — This ones streamers moved with the gusts of wind

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 032 — Functional for feeding, not just part of the Sculptures show!

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 033 — My friends favourite

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 034 — I couldnt help thinking the pole was a work stock line!

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 036 — My personal favourite

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 037 — Cheeky!

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 038 — Another asiatique sculpture

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 039 — A close second favourite

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 041 — “Please dont touch the exhibits” A man was sweeping it clear of sand at the time.

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 042 — An Aussie special!

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 043 — Third favourite

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 050 — Spray and wipe works faster… lasts longer…

2015 Sculptures by the Sea 051 — Tamarrama Beach

October 18, 2015May 24, 2018

Friendship

One of the topics to write about that’s been swirling around my head this week is friendship.

Just this past Friday, I called some of you my ‘blog friends’. Which is true. Friends that I do feel a level of guilt I have let my commitment to communicating with lapse. But it’s not just you that I’ve left out in the cold. I feel I’ve become more and more of a passive friend of late.

A passive friend keeps reading your blog posts, Facebook posts and photos. They comment or like. But they give less and less of themselves. Often, I’ve found it perplexing to be in a conversation where someone says ‘I know’ to much of my news, as they are such a great social media stalkers, and I’ve felt unbalanced in the conversation knowing they share precious little of their life. I have to take the time to think of their interests, their family, the latest things they’d told me about their work, or their health or life.

I know my job has taken more and more of me in the past two years – now it’s my new normal to work from about 7am to at least 5pm and think of that as OK. The effects of this are more widespread than friends though. It means I crowd out time where I could exercise. It means the bedtime is firmer than ever, knowing the long work days take enough out of me to not want to start behind the eight ball, yawning.

I rely on others to plan events, to have milestones like birthdays, house warmings and engagement parties, so that I can formally etch out some time in my calendar for them. It seems very reactive. At some stage, the laws of nature mean I should and must reciprocate.

This week, I’ve worked on being a better friend. I volunteered to help a friend from church paint on our shared day off. I took my day off to plan two gifts (one for a party that had passed) that suited the recipients and me. I made advance plans to have coffee with a friend who lives mere streets away (!!) and loved the time we spent catching up. I squeezed in parties that clashed on the one afternoon, by some act of genius time robbery.

I do wish at this point in the post I had a plan on how I was going to be a better friend. But I just don’t! I could list all the should’s: I should plan to see friends one on one, the way that works best for me. I shouldn’t let the state of my home take priority over people! I should make time for things I enjoy and include those I enjoy spending my time with.

Food for thought.

How do you keep your friendships healthy and happy?